Monday, November 2, 2009

Free, Free at Last

I was visiting my Mom in the hospital yesterday. At one point, my sisters and I went out for lunch. They wanted to make another quick stop before heading back to the hospital.
While we were tooling around, I noticed that my energy was dropping rapidly. Being a coach, I guess I dropped into 'what is really going on here' mode. I knew that I was concerned about my mother but she is really improving. I knew that I was a passenger and kind of at the mercy of my sister's agenda and when I have something to do, it is true I like to be at the helm. But that wasn't it either.
Yet my irritability just kept escalating. Then it occurred to me. It was judgment. Look at her with that hair, or shoes or what was she thinking or what is that driver thinking or why did they put these speed bumps in here?
There were so many whys and whats that I was going into overwhelm.
It reminded me how draining standing in judgment of others is. Always watching to see where others stray from your own lines of acceptability. Or what is wise. Or fashionable or considerate.
Really, does it matter who agrees with you and who doesn't? Who dresses in a way that you find nothing less than ridiculous? Or even what the city planners were thinking about when they put the speed bumps in?
My sisters are good women. Thoughtful and kind women. But we, as a society, and maybe as a species, are so quick to make judgments about others. We rarely even think about it or what effect passing judgment has not only on others but especially on ourselves.
The power that we have at our fingertips is over ourselves and the way we process information, the way we respond to the world around us. I used to be a big time judge and then found out I had a lot more time on my hands to do what I actually wanted to do when I gave it up. Kind of like a judgment fast.
Live and let live. Not just an old James Bond movie...it is also a great way to live.
I don't always remember to stay centered. So I listen to my body. Am I tensing up? If so, why? So often when this happens, I find myself in judgment. And often of myself. So I shake it off, get a grip and choose a more empowering perspective.
How does judging affect you? Physically? Mentally? Spiritually? Emotionally?
Here's your challenge for today...what will you do with the energy that you have as a result of giving up judging? What can you create today with that time? This week? This year?
See what a difference it makes.
Feel free to comment on your experiences.
Enjoy!

3 comments:

  1. Hello, I enjoyed reading your blog...I try not to judge...you just never know what is really happening...and most often done of my business. On your topic of "just be" I often look at my dog and think to myself I want to be more like her....just content with the very simple things in life...

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